The Fake Sam

My family drinks a lot of milk, and we go through bananas like crazy too, so every weekend and sometime during every work-week, I restock us on milk and bananas. That’s what I was doing when I stopped at the Lebanon Mega Foods on Wednesday, August 1st, 2018. *That Mega Foods has since closed and has become a furniture store, but it was still an active grocery store at that time.

So, I went in and got my milk and bananas, and I had checked out and was bagging my items. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and looked up to see a man walking towards me… and he looked a lot like Sam Elliott! He kept walking closer, and as he passed by me, he winked. I was just stunned… and I kept watching him as he walked on down to the Men’s restroom.

I was thinking to myself that he didn’t quite look right, and his hair wasn’t white enough… but then I also thought, maybe Sam touched his hair up… I mean, it’s not outside the realm of possibility. But my son and I had just seen Sam at Wal-Mart the previous Saturday, so I kept coming back to thinking that this guy’s looks weren’t quite right.

But then, I thought, what if it really WAS Sam? What should I do? I took my groceries out to my truck and I thought, hmmm…. should I wait, or go? I had milk, so I didn’t dare wait too long. I looked across the way, and there was a black Camaro parked in the shade, so I took out my phone and snapped a picture of it. I had just put my phone up when I saw the guy leaving Mega Foods and heading for his car.

Now, when I told my co-workers about seeing Sam at Wal-Mart, they gave me all kinds of grief for being too chicken to say anything to him, or ask for a picture with him. So I screwed up all the courage I could and started walking towards “Sam”. I hollered at him on the way, I said, “My friends aren’t going to believe this, they simply won’t believe it.” And he said, in a deep voice that sounded a lot like the real Sam Elliott, “What’s that, Ma’am?”

I said, “That I’m seeing you again, when I just saw you on Saturday at Wal-Mart.” By this time I had come up to him, and what he did next made me sure he wasn’t the real deal, because he put out his hand for a handshake, which was ok, but then he smiled. Now, Sam Elliott has a great moustache that can hide his teeth a bit, but this guy’s teeth, well, no…. NO WAY they were Sam’s teeth!

I was shocked, but I was kinda stuck… so I did shake his hand, but as I turned and left, I was a mess of emotions. I mean, he wasn’t Sam, but he sure didn’t mind being mistaken for him. Should I have called him on it? I think if I ever run into him again, I will. At the time though, I was tired after a long day at work, had to get my milk home, and I was disappointed in him, and in myself for thinking he might be the real Sam…. *sigh.

So, he almost fooled me, but not quite. However, I still have the picture of his car, which shows his plate#, so when next I see the real Sam Elliott’s shiny black Camaro, I will make note of the plate#, for proof! My son told me too, that even though the fake Sam drove a black Camaro, it wasn’t shiny clean and new-looking, like the real Sam’s car. Leave it to my son to notice Sam’s CAR… lol! But I’m glad he did, and he did make a good point about how the real Sam Elliott takes pride in his car and keeps it shiny clean.